Moses and pigs

So listen to this revelation I came up with and or was visited upon me due to boredom and excessive snow totals and yowling cats.
What if… Wait for it… What if Moses did not faithfully rewrite what God said to him about pork. Specifically, what if God said…

“Moses, thou and thou people shalt not eat pigs, nor boars, nor piglets, no guinea pigs nor anything pig named or sounding. And also thou shalt not ever suffer a video to play on the internet where someone pours a can of cola over a pork roast and worms crawl out of it… Got that, Moses?”

“Um yes, pigs, piglets, pork roasts.”
“Good,” says God. “Now, moving along to false idols and idolatry in general… Thou and thou people shalt…”

Now, as we know, when Moses talked to the people he left out the internet video part. We can’t really blame Moses, if that happened at all, of course, but for me and others it is a horror every time someone cooks pork now… I worry…

Was the pork cooked the correct amount of minuets? Hours? Days?

Does anybody really know what the time is?

Do I need meat so badly that I am willingly to eat meat that worms have taken up residence in?

Did all the worms die during cooking or did some make it through?

Did they evolve and now we need more heat or even something else to kill them?

Or, possibly, were they like my brother David F. Sweet and I, and did they build blanket forts over the registers and being thus protected were they then saved from heat stroke, or whatever killed all the other worms? And then, were those two living worms able to survive and infest me when I ate pork? … …

I only know that it could be… If only Moses had remembered to include the internet warning… I would still be infected, maybe, possibly, but I wouldn’t know it…. Oh the horror… The horror…



Learn Guitar repair and instrument building! https://www.amazon.com/Guitar-Works-Big-Book/dp/1549716905



 

Geo Dell’s Guitar Works series of books

Geo Dell’s Guitar Works series of books

GUITAR WORKS 1 – 7 GEO DELL

Guitar Works Volume One: Finish Work Kindle Edition Learn custom guitar work from Geo Twitter: @GeorgeDell01   https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00VF0RYJE

Guitar Works Volume 1 Finish Work paperback Edition Learn custom guitar work   https://www.amazon.com/dp/1521886539


Guitar Works Volume Two: Custom Builds One Kindle Edition Custom builds 1. Short scale Gibson SG build  https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00VITFXZE

Guitar Works two paperback. Custom builds 1. Follow a custom guitar build and learn as you read.  https://www.amazon.com/Guitar-Works-Two-Custom-Builds/dp/1503164187


Guitar Works Volume Three: Custom Builds Two Kindle Edition Custom builds 2. Learn to do your own guitar work #Kindle https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00XNPXHQI

Guitar Works 3. Custom Builds 2. Check out a custom Ovation guitar build start to finish  https://www.amazon.com/Guitar-Works-Three-Custom-Builds/dp/1503198553


Guitar Works Volume Four: The CD60 Build Kindle Edition This volume contains the complete Fender CD60 build https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01390FUSY

Guitar Works Volume 4: The CD60 Build. This volume contains the complete Fender CD60 build  https://www.amazon.com/dp/152186800X


Guitar Works Volume Five: Repair work. Learn to do custom repair work.  https://www.amazon.com/dp/B06XPCGGLZ

Guitar Works Volume 5: Repair work. Learn to do custom repair work. Fretting, more https://www.amazon.com/dp/1520858094


Guitar Works Volume Six: Seven String Jazz Guitar. Follow this acoustic build from start to finish https://www.amazon.com/dp/B073ZKM7PH

Guitar Works Volume 6: Seven String Jazz Guitar. Follow this acoustic build from start to finish https://www.amazon.com/dp/1521867852


Guitar Works Volume Seven: The Scrap Wood Build. An SG bodied build from recycled wood and parts #Luthiery #Guitar https://www.amazon.com/dp/B073ZNHF7D

Guitar Works Volume 7: The Scrap Wood Build. An SG build from recycled wood and parts https://www.amazon.com/dp/1521869006


The Guitar Works Big Book: 535 pages of guitar know how. Custom builds, repair work and much more https://www.amazon.com/dp/B075J48C66

The Guitar Works Big Book. 331 pages. Hundreds of images. Learn custom guitar work https://www.amazon.com/Guitar-Works-Big-Book/dp/1549716905